Girlfriends Mohan-teki de Iincho!? Stepmother
(C91) [VOLVOX (オポコム)] もはん的で委員ちょ!? [中国翻訳]
1217
#229628 - I told myself that I was trying not to have these vivid sexual thoughts - but I was, of course, quite definitely, and I knew, really, that I would have them - I pretended to myself that the thoughts stole up on me, and that I couldn't help it, but that wasn't true - I would think about them, guiltily, building them up, making some kind of more or less coherent picture or scene or story in my mind, so that when I actually masturbated I knew full well that I would have those thoughts - wanted to have them, fully intended to, but pretended they somehow 'made' me think them, that I could not help it. I called it rubbing, and for many years successfully avoided admitting, even to myself, that I was really masturbating.